The mouse that fell from the sky

We had planned to go into Chatham today but after several attempts to negotiate the roadworks we gave up and went to Maidstone instead. We parked up on the roof of the Mall (formerly Chequers Centre) and headed inside. As Ben was quite hungry we went down to the lower level and got something to eat from the Baker Oven.  As Ben sat munching on his cake Sarah went into the 99p shop so I stayed with him on the bench outside.

While we were sitting there I heard a woman squeal and saw something drop from the floor above. At first I thought it was a drop of water or something someone had dropped but as the woman moved off I saw what it was. Lying on the floor was a little mouse that must have fallen off the rail that runs around the opening. I went over to see but as I got there I could tell that it was dying. The poor thing was shaking and breathing really heavily and after a few seconds it stopped.

I decided I couldn’t leave the poor thing there so I picked it up and put it into a bag we had got from the Bakers Oven as Ben ran off to tell Sarah, in a very loud voice, that we’d found a rat! There aren’t any bins in the Chequers centre, sorry the Mall, so I looked around to see if I could find the man I had seen pushing a rubbish cart around earlier. We wandered down to the end of the floor but couldn’t find him, we found the management offices but sadly they were shut. Even worse they didn’t have a letterbox so I couldn’t post the mouse through it (joke).

Going up

So we went up the escalator to the next floor where there was an information desk. I asked the lady if she had a bin and when she said she did I asked if she would like to put the carrier bag in it. She said “no problem” and reached out to take the bag from me just as I added “because it’s got a dead mouse in it!” You’ve never seen anyone pull their hand away so quickly! She did take it from me and gingerly popped it behind the counter while she radio’d the man with the rubbish cart to come at get it.

Oh well he may have had an untimely death but at least he didn’t get squashed underfoot. the least I could do was to make sure he had a decent burial in the rubbish bin


Topical Halloween joke

A lone figure sits in a darkened room, the only light flickering from behind a window illuminates the scene. he sits at a table his shoulders hunched and his hands placed flat on the table.  His head is bowed as if he is waiting for something.

Suddenly he looks up, takes a deep breath and in a shakey voice he says

“Is there anyone there?”

The question cuts through the stillness of the room, hangs momentarily in the air before it fades away leaving nothing but a low hum and the sound of a fan which is blowing cold air around the room making the shirt, wet with perspiration, stick to the mans back. His hands are clammy now and although they would appear to a casual observer to be steady are actually shaking as the man looks around the room as if he was actually expecting an answer. The beads of sweat which have formed on his forehead are starting to trickle down his temples as once again he takes a deep breath and repeats

“Is there anyone there?”

Again the silence envelops the room as the words wither and die in the stillness. The mans eyes dart from side to side as he waits and waits in the stagnant room. He shifts nervously in his chair as the shaking has started to spread from his hands and is now becoming noticeable and his whole body is drenched in sweat.  He is beginning to regret taking this course of action on Halloween and he is almost at the point of giving up when he finds the last ounce of strength in his body and he leans forward and in a shakey voice says

“This is Chris Moyles on Radio 1 – Is there anybody there?”

Just in case you don’t get this click here

Strange sounds

Driving to work this morning I slowly became aware of a strange sound which appeared to be emanating from the direction of the passenger seat. It was intermittent and quite short so it was difficult to work out what it was and where it was coming from. All sorts of thoughts raced through my mind, the suspension? the engine? the chassis? or even something stuck under the car!

The sound itself was odd, not metallic like you would expect in a car. While it was unlike any sound I had heard in the car before it was strangely familiar but I was unable to pinpoint exactly where I had heard it before. Every time I heard it I looked around trying to work out where it was coming from. Eventually I realised that it only happened as I went around the corners and it was either coming from under the passenger seat or just behind it.

When I arrived at work I got out and looked under the seat and there I found the answer. It was James, the red engine, that Ben had left in the car and was rolling to and fro under the seat!

There’s snow business….

Asda’s carpark

Snow started falling on Sunday afternoon and by any standards it wasn’t that heavy where we live. Buy hey this is England and any snow is bad news. As a nation we are totally unprepared for it and every thing grinds to a halt. Admittedly it was heavier in central London and everything there effectively stopped – Buses, trains etc.

The first I knew about it was on Friday evening when Sarah rang me up to tell me it was on it’s way. She suggested that I might like to bring anything I needed to do on the Monday home with me as she knew what I would be like if I was trapped at home. So I packed up the edit suite and took it home with me – I would be thankful I did by Tuesday.

After the initial snow fall it calmed down a bit and then more snow fell later that evening. I was expecting more to fall overnight but when I woke up the next morning it hadn’t. I got up to go to work but when I put the radio on it became apparent that I wasn’t going anywhere. There were no trains running out of Gillingham towards London and almost all of the schools were closed. I rang the office and was told that the car park was solid and they couldn’t get the trucks out so I figured that staying where I was would be the best option!

Outside my front door

So I set up my edit suite in the dining room and got on with some work. The problem I had was that I had a show installing that afternoon so I spent most of the day on the phone trying to sort out what was going to happen. I’ve been doing this for over 20 years and this is the first time I can remember us being defeated by the weather!

Working from home

This post was delayed because I forgot to publish it!